LoveToKnow Cats:AllComments

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Hi Debbie,

Sometimes that "bonkers" behavior is amusing out of our feline friends. He sounds like a lot of fun :)

-- Contributed by: LoriSoard

lol Ghibli is bonkers but bonkers with character. Actually this site has helped me immensely. I read about one ladies Shushing technique and I try it on Ghibli when he gets too rough and it works a treat. It doesn't hurt him, it doesn't break my heart. I feel like I finally have some power HAHA!!! So I'm a silbling? :( I thought because he only comes to me when he is scared and is with me all day he feels safer with me. He definitely knows how to play my husband and I off against each other because he wont leave me alone for one second, even to use to bathroom (he sits on my knee or on the back of my shoulders, or climbs into my pj pants or jeans and sits and waits for me to finish lol but he sits on my shoulders and my husbands also and is just fascinated with what we are doing while he looks down) but I think he likes to think he is being dominant over us because on our shoulders he is almost higher (my husband is 6'6 and I am 6'1) he will sit on our shoulders for as long as he is ready (not us) I must admit, I am softer on him than my husband, I play with him and always want to hug him etc...but my husband doesn't play with him and never walks in the door without giving or buying Ghibli a treat. Ghibli waits for the time when he knows his Dad is coming home and looks out the back window where the car is parked and when his Dad walks in with the shopping bags he screams and throws himself (hard) at his Dads feet and flips and rolls) until his Dad gives him his cat treat or toy. I admit also it kind of makes me jealous because I had to beg my husband for 6 years to have a cat (my husband doesn't really like them he has always had dogs, I was never allowed dogs so always had cats) but my husband adores Ghibli, his life has been so uplifted by this trouble making, class clown. He knows how to play us but thanks to this site we have abit more power. He uses my husband for treats and me for everything else but I know he loves me because he doesn't leave my side. Like I said before if I go outside to the bins or put food out for the hedgehogs or birds he screams for me and almost tries to ram the window in. My husband has to come in and calm him down. When I get back in he gives me big cuddles and starts purring again then will get in a huff with me for leaving him lol He knows he rules the roost. It's always all about Ghibli, even if he thinks he is human lol And he hasn't tried to hump me once since I got your advice and is actually letting me give him more affection (even if it is only for a few seconds longer than usual) it means alot to me. As for the shower thing, he will even wait for my husband to finish his shower and then he jumps in. When I fill the sink up to wash my face he jumps in before I get a chance and have to leave the plug in the sink until he is done YET!!!! he hates the rain lol Like I said 'Bonkers' but we love him so much.

-- Contributed by: Debbie Black

Hi Debbie,

That's hilarious about the shower. And they say cats don't like water!

I think it is probably a pecking order thing. He sees you as more submissive, it sounds like. This isn't to say that he doesn't love you dearly, but it may be that he sees your husband more as a parental figure and you as a sibling figure.

Let me know how the retraining goes and if this situation improves.

-- Contributed by: LoriSoard

Thanks Lori I will try what you say. I do worry about him because I swear he thinks he is human. He always tries to walk on his back legs and I don't know if it's because he is a black cat but he also doesn't like other people in the house. It's just me and his Dad, but even with the humping thing I still don't understand why he is more aggressive with me than is Dad. He never attempts rough play with my husband yet he can never be more than a few feet away from me. Even when he gets scared it is me he hides behind and runs to, so I just don't understand how he see's me. Am I Mum or does me see me as lower than him? He lets his Dad pick him up and cuddle but not me but he knows his Dad gives him treats. I adore my Ghibli, he is so full of character. Like he is so clingy he insists on me holding him in the shower while I'm actually IN the water. I hold him in one hand and have to wash with the other, if I don't pick him up he screams, he jumps in the bath with me and seeks water out all the time, his eating fruit I don't get and he really is scared of apples, and plastic bags and birds but he is everything to me and I will do what you suggested because I just won't even consider giving him up or having him on meds. I can put up with his habits because I guess we are all individuals but I just wish I knew what he see's me as in his eyes. I don't want to be anything but Mum. I do play with him more than my husband. Hide and seek and I have these catnip bubbles he loves and he has so many toys, but sometimes I think he doesn't like me because he gives my husband love and not me. Is it a male thing? I just don't understand.

-- Contributed by: Debbie Black

Hi Debbie,

Ghibli sounds like quite a character! Since he has been neutered, it is likely that the humping is a dominance issue. He is trying to establish his place in your household. However, you need to train him that this behavior is not going to be tolerated. I suspect you are very easy on him, because it sounds like you love him a lot. Here is what I would try to break him from this irritating habit. I mean, it would be horrible to have someone come visit for the first time, and Ghibli decide to hump the visitor's arm!

Watch his pupils. They will likely change when he is getting ready to start this behavior. If you see them dilate, then put him on the floor immediately and tell him 'No' before he can start humping.
If he persists, have a spray water bottle handy and give him a quick squirt and tell him no.
If you tell him no and he stops, praise him lavishly. You can even give him a treat, if you want. Cats respond best to positive reinforcement.

If this fails, then you may want to go ahead and have his hormone levels tested, but it sounds like he is otherwise a healthy cat.

-- Contributed by: LoriSoard

My cat Ghibli is 13 months old, and was spayed at the age of 6 months. He was the runt of the litter and the vet actually said we saved his life. There were 12 other cats on the farm. Anyway after 2 months of having him (he was 4months old) he started humping my arm and my leg. We got him spayed and he calmed down for a few months and over the last couple of months he has actually started humping my arm and leg again but when I pull him off he gets really aggressive, he doesn't attack me but he gets very forceful and persistent. He never tries it with his Dad (my husband) unless we are in bed and then once he gets himself into position he loses interest and goes off to play or sleep but then will try again later. in the last week he has tried to hump my arm or leg at least 3 times a day not including at night. He definitely respects his Dad more than me, but I have had 10 cats in my life, all spayed and none of them have ever done this before. My vet said cats don't get dominant unless your another male cat who hasn't been fixed, but the weird thing is for all that my cat is rude to me and adores his Dad (I'm at home with him all day but my husband is at work and greets him with treats) if I so much as go outside to feed the birds or hedgehogs or put out rubbish he frets for me something bad. I can't even use the bathroom without Ghibli waking up from a sleep and following me. He gets into such a panic when I go outside he nearly tries to scratch the window out and screams and that is WITH my husband in the room with him. It's like he doesn't like me, tries to show me who's boss but can't be without me. He will never stay outside for more than 5 minutes because everything scares him (apples from our tree and birds etc..) and if he gets scared he goes poofy and runs inside to hide behind MY shoulder. It's ME he goes to when he is scared. He was the 13th cat on the farm, one of 4 kittens and he was so skinny the vet said that he would of only had a few weeks to live had we not have saved him. He was a quarter the size of his siblings. He also tries to eat his food with his paws (like he has hands) and steals fruit from the kitchen. He loves strawberries and peaches and plums, and even easy peel oranges. But he is very clever and full of character and has a million toys and a cat tunnel and definitely walks around the house like king of the roost and is very happy, but I think my husband spoils him too much because he runs to the door when my husband comes home and knows he is going to get a treat. I have to tell my husband off, he snuggles in his Dads arms but never mine unless his Dad isn't home and he is cold or is in the mood for a cuddle. But when he does snuggle with his Dad he looks at me as if to say 'ha ha haha ha' but I don't care lol I've never known a cat like it. I would never dream of giving him away because he does no harm and he is so funny and fun to be around and the vet said he is definitely a happy cat and healthy but I don't understand why he is doing the things he is doing. I can't afford to send him to a Cat Therapist as my vet suggested but I did speak to the lady and she said Ghibli is happy but has separation issues and she never mentioned anything about dominance. I would do anything for Ghibli but I just don't know whats going on with him and what I can do to help him. I've had 10 cats in my life and none of them have screamed out Mama every time I go outside from him (it's true he freaked my husband out because he sounds like a child) is rude to me but then tries to hump me and then almost knocks me out when he butts his face on my chin to give affection. Can you PLEASE help me.

-- Contributed by: Debbie Black
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